You have to forgive yourself for whatever that you holding yourself responsible for, you blaming yourself because of some decisions you made. You would be saying “if I knew this would happen, why did I let this person in, why didn’t I think fast, what if I wouldn’t have done that”. Even if you ask yourself those questions nothing is going to change whatever happened happened and u need to deal with and forgive yourself for it. Dwelling in self pity is not the way to go with things. I know there are moments where we feel like absolute failures and that’s when u should let God intervene because forgiving yourself is not easy, the devil will whisper evil thoughts he will remind u of the past and tell u things that u are not.
The bible says we have the nature of Christ, we have his Character and Jesus was so humble and forgiving. The way Jesus was so humble he even washed his disciples feet while it was suppose to be the other way around. The bible teaches us of turning the other cheek when someone slaps you that comes with being selfless and knowing that you have the greater one inside of u yeah we are human and we get angry to a point where we don’t even think straight but if we thought before we act we wouldn’t have so many regrets. Forgiveness is not easy I know others are rape victims others have been abused in all possible ways you can think of, I know people go through the worst in life but forgiveness itself is a gift we have to inherit from our God because he’s a definition of forgiveness himself think about the times you wronged him and He still loves us unconditional. When u forgive the other person u also doing it for yourself because u letting go of the past you letting go of the pain you letting go of the bitterness and u will feel some weight being lifted on your shoulders.
Holding a grudge for someone Is not good nor healthy because whenever u see or think about that person u only think of doing the worst and in other cases others end up doing bad things in anger later on to regret. Look at things this way, people see Judas as a bad person and what they don’t realise it that Judas was needed for us to have this salvation. Jesus knew that Judas was going to betray him and it was beneficial on his side because if Judas didn’t sell Jesus then He wouldn’t have died for us on the cross. There was a time in the bible where Jesus was eating with His disciples and he told them that the one who was going to share a bread with is going to betray him and Judas ate that bread.
Some things need to happen in your life in order for things to fall into place. I got reminded of the story of Joseph, Joseph dreamt of being a king and told his brothers and they sold him, he fell into pits, he was arrested for things he didn’t do but little did he know that whatever trial and tribulations he was going through was leading him to his destiny. God promised to have plans for u plans not to harm but plans to prosper, for one to still be here that means God is still working with you, am not saying everything u went through is God’s plan but am saying He is with you because He will never leave nor forsake you.
We need to let go and let God. Hatred is toxic it is dangerous because it drives people crazy. Instead of focusing on the bad rather focus on the good and see if things will change. Romans 8:18 Your present suffering is not worth the future glory that is going to be revealed in you. James 1 consider it pure joy when you go through trials and tribulations.
We have been declared conquerors and for us to be that means we have to conquere some things first right?
We shouldn’t let what people did to us destroy us we need forgiveness I know it’s not easy but it’s worth it, because you will be doing it for yourself